The Positive Thinking Myth.

We grew up and still live in an era where Thought is hailed.

We’re taught, even brainwashed to believe that our Thoughts direct our destiny.

Rene Descartes said, “I think, therefore I am…”  

Seemingly, a profound discovery, many philosophers and modern motivational speakers have catapulted their careers based on this very finding. 

Napoleon Hill found riches after fulfilling Carnegie’s wishes for writings on the science of success.  That very book touts the title… “THINK and Grow Rich”

Earl Nightingale opined, “You are now, and you do become, what you Think about.”

In my twenties, I had a mentor – she professed, “ You MUST engulf your mind with teachings from Zig Ziglar, Dale Carnegie, Brian Tracy, Og Mandino…” … all who claimed that what you THINK IS the Answer.  That one should Think Positively All Day Long.

She shared that from an early age, she would have tapes from these trainers running in the background at her home and in her car… as her children went about their days with the goal of “Positive Brainwashing”.

Naturally, many of us have immersed ourselves in these same teachings.

But are we happy?

The Thinking fallacy

Personally, I spent my entire early adult life doing exactly this.  I read, listened to tapes, attended motivational seminars all spewing the THINKING fallacy.  Like my early mentor, I purposely soaked my mind with their THINKING basis.

I say fallacy because the end goal was never reached using these means.  

Meaning, the ultimate goal is not for more money, more sales, a higher salary, a better position, status, achievement… (although thinking may seem to sometimes bring these things to fruition.)

… None of that is the ultimate goal, is it?

Ultimately, we’re all seeking happiness THROUGH those things. Those so-called achievements.

But if we’re honest with ourselves, truly honest… we’d admit we’re still not truly happy.

I read somewhere that the definition of being content is “the state of peaceful happiness…”

So if we were content, we would be in a state of peaceful happiness. Follow me here.

And if we were truly content, would your happiness be contingent on our achievements?

No?

So, what’s the answer??

A Radical Shift from ‘Positive Thinking’

Let me propose a radical shift in your beliefs.  I know, for most, this concept will not make any sense… 

But let me emphasize, I ONLY uncovered what I feel is Truth be it happiness, joy, or whatever else you want to call it…

… when I STOPPED the addiction to incessant thinking.

I recall being frustrated in my late 20’s.   Taking the advice of mentors, I knew I had done everything they taught to the T!  I thought, day and night, about what I wanted to become in an all-out effort to build my conceptual future reality of more money, top rankings in my career, more status…

In a state of mental defeat, I thought to myself, “What if this is all a lie.  What if my own thinking is sabotaging my happiness?  What if all this ‘positive’ thinking BS is a bunch of crap!”  

Next, I sarcastically thought, “Maybe I need to start thinking Negative instead! Hell, I’d probably have a better chance of getting what I want!”

But right after I pushed that thought out of my mind, another thought eased in…

“What if I didn’t think positively OR negatively?

What if I could STOP thinking?

And if I didn’t think positively OR negatively… could I think neutrally?

Crazy idea, I thought…

Another through crept in. “What if I could stop thinking altogether?”

This clue left me.  Yeah, it would come up again from time to time, but I didn’t know how to stop thinking. 

It wasn’t until a pivotal moment of defeat engulfed every fiber of my being.  My son was about to be born and I still didn’t have it figured out. I needed a way to know my family was taken care of. 

Being scared, hopeless, and lost… I cried out to something, someone, the universe, God?

Once I was Aware of thought… change came.

After that day, things began to make sense.

I relinquished the constant need to think.  I found out how thinking could not exist without a conceptual idea of TIME.   

And the more I did that was opposite to what those mentors taught me… the more life began to open up. 

Sounds crazy, I know!

The less I ‘focused’, the more I got out of the way, the more things worked themselves out.

When I started loosening my grip, when I released the need to always be in control, and outer life force began to hug me with more of what I wanted.

Here’s the irony.  I began to not WANT what I wanted before.  All the success, money, status – it wasn’t as important to me.   That’s the exact moment things started to come on their own.

But none of that mattered or even compared to the inner silence that blossomed.

An inner calm, a background state of ease regardless of what was happening in the outer world was now my companion.

Yeah, I still get worked up. I still worry at times. But that background feeling of peace is always there.

This post is not designed to teaching you anything. It’s not here to tell you what you should or shouldn’t do. You’re only reading this because it’s a pointer.

My hope is that these events can give you clues into what you can research or even REALIZE on your own. 

There’s no need to search, although searching can point you to what’s already there. There’s no need to work towards, no need to create or find.   

Once thinking ceases, truth is revealed.